So Very Blessed...

I was randomly looking at blogs online...I know, what a crazy and fantastically wild life I live. Well, to be honest, I was searching for my name on the blogger search and I came across a blog of someone with the same name as me. Well, my maiden name. As I was looking at her blog, I read that she recently lost her little baby girl due to the effects of Trisomy 18. The syndrome is caused by the presence of an extra material from chromosome 18 which interferes with normal development.

While reading the blog I came across a video post of another family's who son had the same disorder. The video is called 99 Balloons. I will warn all mother's or anyone who loves a child, this will be tear at your heart. The video was put together by the parent's of the little boy and it is honestly so beautiful. I wanted to share the video with those who may have not seen it. http://www.ignitermedia.com/products/iv/singles/570/99-balloons

After watching the video and seeing the true love and devotion that the parent's have and had for their son, I feel so very ungrateful and feel that I take so many things for granted. This couple has such great faith and was so thankful for each day. I should be giving thanks every day for my healthy son and celebrating each day. We get so busy with the trivial things in life that we take for granted the true blessings...I should feel so blessed to have my son to share in this life on this mortal earth.

What an inspiration this couple is...
(sorry, I am so sentimental and emotional lately. What is my problem?)

Why is this so hard for me?

We are moving, yes, finally moving. We realized that we had outgrown our duplex the day we brought Parker home from the hospital. Not really but with all the toys and baby things we definitely realized that we wouldn't be bringing home another baby to live here. We need a bigger place. The whole moving idea is very, very bitter-sweet. In the conversations I have had with Kory, I have said how excited I am to have a new house and to leave our little home, which is true-- but in all actuality, it's so sad to think of leaving. I laid awake about a week ago thinking of all the memories we have had in our little home and it's so hard for me to think of packing up and leaving it all behind. I start to cry whenever I begin to think about it-- I am actually getting teary right now. This was our first home together as a married couple. We have shared so many memories here. This is also Parker's first home. This is where we brought him home to.To think of a new little family moving in and using the nursery that Kory worked so hard on is hard for me (even though we didn't use it much, other than a play room). I guess since we are not selling it though, I can ask the renters if I can go in and sit in the room and cry. That's not too weird, right? LOL.

This is where Parker first crawled and took his first steps. This is where I have spent many a sleepless night with a sick little boy. This is where Parker has had many a bubble bath and this is where he had his first sledding experience in the backyard.

This is where Parker had his first birthday party and where he learned to say his first words. I could go on and on. Kory keeps reiterating that we will make new memories in a new place and I realize this, but it doesn't make it any easier. We are closing a chapter in our lives and opening a new one. I know, I know, we all have to make changes and to grow, such is life. I just have a hard time letting go.

Goodbye to our sweet little duplex. Hello to my mom's and her basement for 6 months. We are sure going to miss this place!

SO VERY SICK!

I had a bit of a scare on Monday. Sorry, this is going to be a long story. I woke up about 3 am feeling so sick. I got out of bed and went and immediately threw up. I was thinking great, Kory has poisoned me (not really). I went and laid on the couch and decided to watch a little tv since I was feeling so sick. About a half hour later I threw up again and started having chest pains. Anyway, I continued to throw up until about 8 am and still had a constant pain in my chest that had now moved into my back. I was laying in on the bathroom floor and Parker came in with a puzzled look. I said, "Mommy is sick," and he came over and said, "Sick, I so-wee," and rubbed my back. Kory saw how sick I was and told me we should probably go to Instacare to see what was going on. I hesitated but knew it was probably for the best. I actually was hesitant because I was a mess and knew I would not be able to freshen myself since I could barely stand. I actually haven't shaved my legs this winter and knew that I was going to frighten anyone that had to look at my legs.

Kory definitely knew I was ill when I left the house in maroon pants and a green shirt with slippers on reaking of sickness So, the wait at the clinic was about an hour and we finally saw the doctor. They decided to do an EKG and do some x-rays. After an hour wait another dr. came in and said that they were a bit worried about my EKG. The results showed inverted lines which could be a sign of paracarditis (fluid around the heart). Of course I started to panic and figured that I was about to die... The dr. said they were waiting for a cardiologist to call to see what the next steps would be. We waitied for another half hour when the dr. came in and said the cardiologist hadn't called but he recommended us going to the ER. Of course I didn't want to go to the ER but I was too worried about my heart stopping so we headed to the hospital.

At the hospital they hooked me up to an IV and gave me some pain medication. So, I was feeling much better at that point. They did another EKG (now two guys had to stick the sticky's on my legs and they looked so frightened by the hair. Kory was a bit embarrased.) and the ER doc said he didn't see anything too alarming. What? Nothing alarming? Why did we rush here? They did an ultrasound of my chest and looked at my gall bladder and said that things looked alright. The ER doc gave me a prescription for acid indigestion and told me to go home and take the medication. I WAS SO MAD. I went to the ER for indigestion? My gut tells me that there was something else going on because I have never been so sick. I would have rather been in labor! What a day!